Recently, I was asked what I “stand for” in terms of my business. It was easy for me to answer as it is both my passion and my purpose. I stand for empowering women to gain emotional and financial freedom.
I stand for women releasing all the baggage and titles put on them by society, family members, past experiences, traumas, etc. Those constant thoughts of “I am not good enough”, the worry, fear, anxiety, guilt, shame, etc.
I stand for women having choices through financial freedom.
When I see smart, capable, wonderful women not reaching their goals, not reaching the levels of happiness they desire - thinking that the answer is longer hours, more education, more tools, or that something is "wrong with them", etc. - I want to scream from a mountain top that they already have everything they need — It is simply their MINDSET getting in their way.
I have watched too many women be weighed down by their thoughts, blocks, fears and beliefs.
I was one of them. I felt responsible for everyone and everything. I always put others needs first. I really thought as a "Christian" that it was what I was "supposed to do". I actually didn't mind it - until I did. Until I started to notice one-way relationships. I thought it was simply my "nature" and that it was the “right” way to be. However, twice a year I would hit a wall, get sick and my body and mind would force me to "take care of myself." What I found out through personal development - was that at the root cause, it was limiting beliefs. It was the “role” that I had been given as a child and taken on due to my circumstances, experiences, traumas and beliefs. I can tell you that once you clear all that "stuff" and step in to your authentic self, learn to practice healthy boundaries - life is calmer and more enjoyable.
I have watched too many women not have the financial freedom that allows them to have choices.
I personally have worked very hard to have financial freedom and I have then lost that freedom. Having financial freedom is a much better way to live. You have choices. You can help those you love.
Recently I was at the beach. There is something about the sea that draws me to it. The salt air, the salt water, the warm sand between my toes - that relaxes me and refreshes and renews me at the same time. My goal is to live at the beach. I inherited this love of the sea from my Irish Grandmother. I have such great memories as a little girl walking hand-in-hand with her for hours as she talked about her life in Ireland and how much the sea meant to her.
I love collecting shells and I love journaling when I am at the beach.
What I am grateful for.
What my wins were for the year.
What I would like the rest of my year to look like.
What I have planned and what I would like for next year.
This has to do both my professional and my personal life.
I then take a marker and all the big shells I have collected and write all the things that I need to let go of on the shells. Perfectionism, Expectations, Disappointments - along with the names of those who I feel may have caused some hurt or disappointment.
I walk down to the water, look at the shells, read each of the words on them and say out loud, “These do not serve me” as I throw the shells far into the ocean. It is an exercise that I do at my retreats and it is powerful. I stand there imagining the tide pulling those shells deep into the ocean to "wash away" the words, the feelings that did not serve my highest good.
You see when we hold on to these negative thoughts and emotions - we become a victim and victims have no power. In order to be able to change, you must have power. We must therefore take responsibility for NOT being a victim and take action.
The baggage we carry - the negative thoughts, blocks, fears and limiting beliefs - THEY are what hold us back from gaining greater success and happiness. They are what get in the way of healthy relationships and breaking toxic generational patterns. I will acquire some new ones from time to time and must be sure that I release them if I want to fully move forward and fully support my clients.
When I tell my clients that they do not need to work long hours in order to be successful - yet I catch myself, you guessed it; putting in long hours - that is not walking the walk. I justify it by telling myself
I have a vision of helping as many women as possible. I also justify it because of financial commitments. However, what I have just been reminded of by my own coach - is that I need down time. I need "Me Time" to relax, renew, and to be able to be refreshed and get creative.
So my commitment to myself, my family, my friends and to my clients is that I will be taking more “Me Time” and I will do more of what I love - with those I love. My vision is big - but so is my heart.
Ladies … we HEAR those constant negative thoughts and doubts and fears.
When we HEAR the same thing over and over again - we begin to BELIEVE it.
When we BELIEVE it and they become LIMITING BELIEFS.
If you are struggling to reach your goals in your business, if you are not happy with where you are in your life or in your relationships - I encourage you to examine your thoughts.
Start journaling. Notice what are you saying to yourself on a daily basis and ask yourself, “Would I say this to my Daughter? Mother? Sister? Best Friend?" If not, find a way to stop saying them to yourself.
Immerse yourself in personal development, read books - do whatever it takes - because you deserve better.
Everything you need is already inside of you … that beautiful little girl without all the labels and fears and doubts - she is still inside of you. You simply need to release all the “stuff” that is limiting her from emerging and from you stepping into YOUR POWER and YOUR PURPOSE.
It all begins with your MINDSET. I BELIEVE IN YOU!